when I try to do "all the things" part 2

Last week I gave you all a glimpse of the heart behind why our family started on a journey towards a more intentional, minimal lifestyle. The heart intentions behind big life changes keep us on track when the world wants to pull us away from where we aspire to go. Part 2 is all about what happened after we realized that we were missing out on how glorious life could be.

So for those who read part 1 and stuck around for part 2...thanks. Anyone who hasn't yet read part 1...no problem, thank you too for joining the conversation.

---

Before I dive deep into the changes we made as a family, let me open with a quote from Christian author Courtney Ellis' book Uncluttered:

We consumer more, so we work more. We work more so we can consume more. And slowly, the working and consuming take the place of worshiping God. Instead, we worship possessions and experiences rather than the one who created us to find our true selves only in him.

She goes on to refer to Romans 1 verses 22 and 23

"Claiming to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man, birds, four-footed animals, and reptiles."

Now we may not be exchanging the glory of God for reptiles but that's not the point of the passage. In Paul's time, this looked like bowing down to false gods and statues. For us...in 2019...this passage is pointing at how we tend to care more about the stuff in our life or how pretty our Instagram feed looks or getting the perfect beach-side selfie.

Luke chapter 12 verse 33 does a great job explaining this as well...

For where your treasure is, there your heart will also be.

If our heart is in curating the most beautiful, picture-worthy, friends-will-be-jealous-when-they-visit home, there will be consequences. Remember last week? Every yes is a no to something else.

If our heart is in keeping the most updated social media account and selecting the most beautiful photos of ourselves and our lives...chances are you will be spending a lot of time looking at a screen instead of those people who are in your pictures. Every yes is a no.

The one who loves silver is never satisfied with silver, and whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with income... Ecclesiastes 5:10

Nothing of this world will ever fully satisfy. And don't let anyone tell you differently. If you are Christian woman reading this...you know I am right. You know that having a beautiful house, a trendy wardrobe or the most up to date things can make you happy for a moment. But heck...I am definitely NOT saying you can't have nice things! All I am saying is that there is a fine line that we all tiptoe between needing more and feeling grateful for what we have.

We chose to unclutter our lives to make space both physically and mentally for Jesus, for the things in our life that we think really matter, for gratitude, for feeling like we are enough just as we are.

Enough.

This is a term I have seen and heard more and more in mainstream media. It is used by influencers and in ALL the personal growth books. But, I am going to be honest, up until a little bit ago, I did not truly get the meaning of this word in the context it should be used. For me, it felt slightly negative. Like it could be synonymous with settling for something less. Like it's when we are at our witts end and we just throw up our hands and say 'ENOUGH'! Or it made me feel like I was incapable of doing everything...which is actually true, it's just a hard pill to swallow for a woman like me. I was COMPLETELY missing the boat. And just in case you don't quite understand it either, I am going to break it down into 3 parts that radically reshape our lives and helped us find simplicity and contentment. You can use these as a guide to help simplify your lives too.

Remember being enough will look totally different for me as it does for you as it does to Jenni down the street. The concepts are the important part, how you choose to apply them will probably be different than how we do in our house.

I do enough.

This can truly go a million directions but I am going to take it down the road of to-do-lists today. And get that negative judgment out of your head because this does not mean you are just getting by because you are only doing enough...that makes me feel unworthy or unambitious. No "I do enough" means you are not overworked and you are not lazy, you do enough.

If we are truly honest we could make a list probably front and back of a college-ruled sheet of paper with all of the things we wish we could accomplish in a day. I would give a few examples here of what would be on my list but that seems like a waste of both of our time because we are all grown adults who have to care for ourselves and probably helpless little humans as well. If we made that list we could maybe, in an average day, accomplish a quarter of it...maybe a third. This can leave us feeling discouraged that we couldn't do it all. Or even if we could finish the whole list...every yes is a no remember so you're finishing the list at what cost...this usually makes us feel proud, like supermom.

The items we check off our list in a day do not define our worth as a mom.

If you're like me sometimes it is even hard to just sit and play with your kids because your mind is racing on all the things you could/should be doing. I find myself playing with them and then as soon as they are content I sneak off to fold some clothes or wash some dishes. AND I feel ashamed of myself later for doing so. For not just taking the 20 minutes to sit with my kids and play....all because of this damn list. Written down or not it plagues my brain.

Enter into my life...I do enough.

Try to pick 3 items that would be at the top of your to-do-list and just do them. Big or small. Three things you could do on that day that are realistic and would make you feel like you accomplished something that day. Three things. That's it. Do this for a week and you'll see how nonessential most of the activities are that you previous though had to be done. (Remember the quote last week from Greg McKeown, "You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything.") Or you'll find out that someone else in your house is perfectly capable of doing chores you never thought before to ask them to do. By practicing this I free myself to play with my kids, to feel less anxious about taking a break...which we ALL need by the way. I tell you what, I never regret playing with my kids over washing the dishes but I regret it every time they go to bed and I know I should have spent those extra few minutes on the floor with them.

Yes, mama, I am talking to you right now...You do enough.

I have enough.

This concept is a little easier to wrap your brain around without a full explanation. It plays perfectly into the minimalist mentality we are currently adopting and shaping to fit our life. This will look different for everyone so it is difficult for me to give straight forward examples but you can think about it by asking yourself this question,

"Is ______ essential for my daily, weekly, monthly routine?"

If there are bottles of beauty products you haven't touched in months, you probably aren't using them for a reason. If there is a certain kitchen item that you got for a wedding gift 7 years ago but haven't broken out of the box yet...maybe it's time to donate. For the first year we lived in our house we didn't have a microwave. Many people couldn't imagine living without one but we did, microwaves were not essential to us. The only reason we put one in when we remodeled the kitchen is for resale.

Now I know some things have sentimental value and maybe are not used often. Take for example the boxes of China dishes in our basement that we have never even taken out of the box. We will never get rid of them because they were passed down to us from family members. Something like that we will make space for.

It's the items that are taking up space that you have no real connection with that are just cluttering your space and your life. These things are often the items that get in the way of the things you use daily. Just get rid of them! The heart intentions behind this philosophy are teaching our children we don't need things to make us happy. The amount of stuff we have does not define our worth. There is nothing in our closet or cupboards or decoration on the mantel that will fulfill us a deep heart level. They are nice to have and do bring us joy, but that's where their value ends.

I am enough.

Last and most importantly, you are enough. This is the part that gets a little tricky to explain. This concept is the driving force to the two listed above. This phrase used to make me feel as if I was settling for less that I could be. BUT IT'S NOT! What it means is that we need to do a body and mind scan weekly maybe even daily sometimes hourly! Are you feeling anxious, tired, run-down, overworked, stressed, discontent? We often chalk this up as just being part of "motherhood". Moms are supposed to be tired and run down because our jobs are hard...which is true...to a certain extent. Those feelings could be signs that you are doing too much or have too much in your life.

Since adopting this enough mentality, I feel more joy in just being with my children. I have more patience with them because I don't have some hidden agenda. We have decluttered our home and donated items that are no longer of use to us, so I also clean less often than in the past. This has given me more downtime to relax, watch a show on Netflix or write a blog! Believing you are enough is giving yourself permission to check in on yourself and make real changes to better your life which will pour over to everyone you love.

---

Believing you do enough, have enough and are enough has a trickle-down effect on others.

Recently we had a missionary priest lead the service at our church. The typical message from these types of visitors consists of telling us how terrible people are living where they are from and they ask us (or he even admitted) they beg us for money. But this man had a different way of asking that hit me at a soul level. He asked us to...

Live simply so others may simply live.

Luke has a similar message for us...

Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Make money-bags for yourselves that won’t grow old, an inexhaustible treasure in heaven, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. Luke 12:33

By donating, we are giving others who need items we don't an opportunity to own them at a lower cost than buying new. By not spending as much money on things we truly don't need we have more to give to church and charity. For us, the whole minimalist movement is a journey towards finding hope in the Lord instead of things. I don't think it is talked about enough in our culture because things are how the world says how much we are worth. Living a life of enough is, what I believe, Jesus calls us to do.

“Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them. For everything in the world-the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.” 1 John 2:15-17

And as always...

Be empowered. Be centered. Be intentional.